S02, Episode 04: What to do?

The immersion paradox

There is one system that we know works for learning a language to fluency virtually 100% of the time. This is the experience that children have in their first few years of life, being totally immersed in an environment in which language is an important means of connecting with others and getting what they need.

Since we know this works so well, why don’t more classrooms recreate this experience for adults?

To be fair, there are immersive language schools, and there are language courses that try to incorporate immersion. But these are far outnumbered by classrooms and teaching methods that entirely ignore the way people naturally learn languages.

怎麼辦？(Zěnme bàn?)

Luckily, with a little bit of effort, we can create immersive conditions for ourselves. We don’t need to immerse ourselves 24 hours a day, nor do we need to move to a Mandarin-speaking country. Best of all, we don’t need to search high and low for a Mandarin teacher who understands the importance of immersion. Any Mandarin speaker can, in theory, be your language parent.

What is a language parent?

If learning to speak Mandarin is like raising a Mandarin-speaking child inside your mind, a language parent is someone who plays the role of parent for that inner child.

Anyone who speaks the language fluently can be a language parent. A good language parent need not be a professional language teacher. Here are some features that make up a good language parent:

1. A good language parent is someone you feel comfortable talking to. They don’t give you pressure or criticize your mistakes. They don’t act impatient when you’re at a loss for words. They make you feel safe taking risks and making mistakes. If they laugh at something you say, it’s in a way that makes you feel accepted and appreciated, not ridiculed.

2. A good language parent is willing to speak to you in 99% Mandarin, at least for a set amount of time. They don’t fall back on English or another language when you run into communication difficulties. Instead, to the greatest extent possible, they rely on body language or pictures to get the message across. It’s alright to translate a word or two here and there, but it’s important to be mindful not to let this turn into just speaking in English, which would defeat the purpose.

3. A good language parent actively tries to communicate with you. They don’t passively wait for you to entertain them or suggest a topic. They ask you questions. They are curious about you. When you struggle, they actively guess what you’re trying to say.

4. A good language parent only rarely corrects you. Contrary to popular assumption, being corrected rarely helps you get better at speaking. More often, it just makes you work harder to avoid making mistakes, which over time will make you more timid and less confident. The absence of mistakes is not the same thing as fluency.

5. Instead of correcting you, a good language parent can reiterate what you said, rephrasing it in their own words. This serves the purpose of confirming that they understood you, and it also gives you a chance to imitate them. Doing this, you might notice some differences between what you said and what they said. Noticing these differences yourself is a far more powerful way to improve your speaking than being corrected.

Finding your language parents

As I said, any Mandarin speaker can, in theory, be a good language parent for you. If you already know someone who speaks Mandarin, it might just be a matter of asking them whether they would be willing to speak to you in Mandarin for a while. Otherwise, language exchanges or online tutoring platforms are also places where you might find a good language parent.

Once you have found someone who is willing to speak Mandarin with you, then just focus on having fun. Can you enjoy speaking Mandarin with this person, however halting the conversation might be? If it’s fun, you’ll want to keep doing it.

On the other hand, if you feel that the other person is giving you pressure or not guiding you in the way you want to be guided, it is perfectly legitimate to walk away and find someone else. Unlike actual childhood, we get to choose our language parents!

Just remember, regardless of how good a language parent you have, some amount of frustration is normal. Be patient with yourself. You are, after all, just starting out.

Lesson Outline:

• [00:20] What makes a good language parent?

• [06:00] Finding your language parents

• [08:03] Introduction to the dialogue

• [08:55] Dialogue (normal speed)

• [09:41] Slow version (and repeat)

• [11:42] Useful vocabulary and phrases from the dialogue

• [15:24] Dialogue again (normal speed) 

• [16:26] Slow version again (and repeat)

Daily Practice Session

Words and phrases with examples (Chinese characters only)

[scroll further down for pinyin and the translation]

1. 緊張 

   1.  我好緊張  

   2.  你為什麼緊張？

   3.  你在緊張什麼？ 

2.  擔心 

   1. 我很擔心  

   2. 我很愛擔心   

   3. 不要擔心 

3. 乾淨 

   1.  我的家很乾淨  

   2.  我很愛乾淨  

   3.  這是乾淨的嗎？

4. 應該 

   1.  應該是吧  

   2. 這應該是乾淨的  

   3.  你不應該這樣說 

5. 先  

   1.  我先走了！ 

   2.  你先吃吧！

   3. 那我先回家  

6. 拿 

   1.  我拿，好不好？

   2.  這個給你拿 

   3.  不要拿走  

7. 麻煩你了 

8. 怎麼了？  

9. 怎麼辦？  

Words and phrases with examples (w/ pinyin and translation):

1. 緊張 :: jǐnzhāng :: Nervous

   1.  我好緊張

      1. wǒ hǎo jǐnzhāng

      2. I’m so nervous. 

   2.  你為什麼緊張？

      1. nǐ wèishéme jǐnzhāng?

      2. Why are you nervous?

   3.  你在緊張什麼？

      1. nǐ zài jǐnzhāng shénme?

      2. What are you nervous about? 

2.  擔心 :: dānxīn :: To worry, worried.

   1. 我很擔心

      1. wǒ hěn dānxīn

      2. I’m really worried. 

   2. 我很愛擔心

      1. wǒ hěn ài dānxīn

      2. I’m a person who loves to worry.  

   3. 不要擔心

      1. búyào dānxīn

      2. Don’t worry. 

3. 乾淨 :: gānjìng :: Clean

   1.  我的家很乾淨

      1. wǒ de jiā hěn gānjìng

      2. My home is really clean. 

   2.  我很愛乾淨

      1. wǒ hěn ài gānjìng

      2. I love cleanliness / I’m a neat freak. 

   3.  這是乾淨的嗎？

      1. zhè shì gānjìng de ma?

      2. Is this clean? 

4. 應該 :: yīnggāi :: Should

   1.  應該是吧

      1. yīnggāi shì ba

      2. That should be, that should be the case. 

   2. 這應該是乾淨的

      1. zhè yīnggāi shì gānjìng de

      2. This should be clean. 

   3.  你不應該這樣說

      1. nǐ bù yìng gāi zhèyàng shuō

      2. You shouldn’t say that. 

5. 先 :: xiān :: First / right away 

   1.  我先走了！

      1. wǒ xiān zǒule!

      2. I’m leaving now. 

   2.  你先吃吧！

      1. nǐ xiān chī ba!

      2. You start eating!

   3. 那我先回家

      1. nà wǒ xiān huí jiā

      2. Then I’ll go home now. 

6. 拿 :: ná :: To hold, to pick up

   1.  我拿，好不好？

      1. wǒ ná, hǎobù hǎo?

      2. I’ll hold it, OK?

   2.  這個給你拿

      1. zhège gěi nǐ ná

      2. You hold this. 

   3.  不要拿走

      1. búyào ná zǒu

      2. Don’t take this away. 

7. 麻煩你了 :: máfan nǐle :: Sorry to trouble you

8. 怎麼了？ :: zěnmele? :: What’s wrong? 

9. 怎麼辦？:: zěnme bàn? :: What should we do? 

Thank you for listening!